Infection or Affection

From the time that we are small, most women dream about their wedding day. We plan the colors, the theme, the scheme, and the man. We plan out the details that are most important at the time, like flowers, music, and the dress. Most often we forget to include the most desirable features of the man. The man is usually the last thing we think about.

Why is that? Do we not have an ideal man in mind? Is our ideal man an image of another man in our lives? Do we know what we really want from or in a man?

We choose people to be in our lives for various reasons. Some people are in our lives because they give us strength, love, affection, peace of mind, companionship, etc. These are the people that we consider to be our friends. Those that have our best interest at heart. These are the people that would do anything for us and do anything to keep us from being hurt. When a man has this role in our lives it can lead to precarious outcomes. We have to be certain that the perceived affection is more than a verbal acknowledgement.

Then there are those that infect us…These are the people that have ulterior motives in regards to being in our lives. They seek to take something from us. When these people come along they give us something. They give us a temporary fill. They give us just enough to keep us at bay. When dealing with infectious people, we often lose ourselves. We focus so much on them that we let go of who we are.  We know the effects that follow, yet we continue to allow ourselves to be involved. We let the infection reach our hearts. Once that is done you have a “women fed-up” or a “woman scorned”.

A fed-up woman will typically leave the situation once she realizes that the status of the situation is more than she wants to endure. She will allow the man to “get away” with so much before she reacts. A woman that is fed-up with her current circumstances usually plans an exit strategy. A woman scorned, on the other hand,  typically stays in the situation until she is forced out. She has to face her reality because there are no more cloaks or green screens to hide the truth.

We have the choice to decide what we want to involve ourselves in. We are in control of who is in our lives. We distinguish the difference between who can infect us and who is truly attempting to show us affection.

#toxic #relationships #love #pain #affection